My head hurts... (A poly-rant)

I think it is from too much thinking. Or, perhaps, from too much deconstructing. There has not been one area of my life that I have not been analyzing, struggling with, or learning from. The constant challenges at work, the uncertainty of work and healthcare in general, relationships, church, spirituality.... all of these things have kept my mind spinning. So, I thought I would share a few random rants and thoughts... to give a taste of my thoughts lately.

... Stark County (and Ohio in gereral most likely) is very parochial, and if it is going to be successful, the hospital of Western Stark county must understand this and play into that. Even if it is owned by some corporate "outsider" monolith, that doesn't mean that it can bring outside "expert" help and get positive results. "All politics are local" is a famous truism... so it is with healthcare. I need to be on a guidance board... ;-)

...When you have a paradigm shift, it is truly like Alice in Wonderland (or the Matrix, if you prefer): Once you have taken the red pill, there's no going back. So, as I look at what Jesus says, I'm struck more and more by the fact that I've had it wrong all along. When Paul says, "There's no other name in which you are saved," I now wonder if he meant that in the literal, immediate since which the context seems to demand. When Rome invaded Judea, historically, no Christians were killed, because they all believed in Jesus and his message, and fled, allowing utter destruction to come upon the Jews (unfaithful Israel) alone. What does such a statement in such a context mean for me, today? (Lest any flip out, I do think that there are important ways such messages speak to us today, but I no longer look at it in the direct way that I used to.)

...I love curriculum development, educational planning, and assessment models. If I had the resources and unlimited reign... (since most of you who know me are cringing at the thought, I will not dwell on that blessed (or cursed) state of affairs!)

...Why do people hate change??? I'll never get it. No matter how fast or slow it is presented, there are always gripers. If something doesn't work, then change it. If that doesn't work, change it again. Oy. What's the big deal?

...Why do relationships have to be so difficult? Why did I have to be born in a generation that has watched our parents' marriages fall apart, and in fact watched many of our generation endure divorce? Can I, and others, be blamed for our "gun shy" attitudes about marriage? Why do I have such a hard time opening myself up... to joy, but also hurt? (There's the answer, eh?)

...How can I sustain my singleness much longer, when I am increasingly feeling "traditionless?" Though I have the best friends and circle of spiritual family that a person could want, I nevertheless am not integrated into any one family unit's tradtions. One family has a tradition of getting a tree, decorating it, and watching a certain movie together the day after Thanksgiving. My best friend did something similar with just he and his wife. That is a very exciting, and warming, tradition, one that don't have any share in. I actually nearly broke down on Sunday while singing, because I suddenly realized that the holidays make people feel lonely not because you don't have someone, but because you don't have any one to share traditions with. I have been struggling with whether or not to put up a tree this year. I struggle each year... the last two years I have put up a "blessing tree" where I decorate it with "blessing ornaments" from years past. But I have no one to put it up with, no one to share the past blessings with, no one to enjoy the warm feelings that the glow of a tree at night produces. While thinking about all that, I thought of my grandma, whom I love dearly. Every year, she decorates here little apartment with lots of Christmas decorations, and puts a little ceramic Christmas tree up. No one shares in that, at least no one person or group of people in a regular way. She's be a widow for decades... the loneliness of it all, and the fact for the first time I could relate, nearly brought me to tears.


...I currently have asthmatic bronchitis... I have never really wheezed before, and it is a vulnerable feeling, the physician being a patient. Plus migraines... oy vay. (which, as I recently discovered thanks to Carey and her "Joy of Yiddish" book, literally means, "Oh the pain!".)

That's enough. I have ranted long enough. Indeed, my head hurts.

So you think going to war in Iraq was stupid...

If you think that the reasons for going to Iraq (and staying there) were stupid, try reading a little bit of the history of World War I. Most likely, you'll come out of that endeavor confused, frustrated, and acknowledging the wisdom of Solomon when he stated that there was nothing new under the sun.

I mean, come on, can we even now understand the foolish reasoning of a war that engulfed nearly all of Europe and much of North Africa and the Middle East? I remember growing up, and learning that World War I was triggered by the assasination of Archduke Ferdinand in Sarajevo (yep, that Sarajevo, famous for the Winter Olympics, the bombings of the Bosnian War, and Christmas Night Over Sarajev0). But that was the the extent of my knowledge.

But here is the gist of the start of the war: Archduke Ferdinand is assassinated in Sarajevo, Austria attacks Serbia, Germany invades Belgium, and then invades France. France mounts a defense and Russia begins preparing to attack Germany. Does that make any sense to anyone? And that is just the beginning of the War.

A little more background and detail does not bring much elucidation: A Serbian nationalist assassinated the heir to the Austro-Hungarian throne, Ferdinand, while he was in Austrian-controlled Bosnia. Austria retaliated against Serbia. Russia, who was allied with Serbia, prepares to intervene. Germany, who is supportive of any action by Austria, decides that it is in their best interest to try to neutralize its biggest threats, France and Russia. Foolishly, it decides to attack France through neutral Belgium, breaking longstanding neutrality treaties, thus irking the wary British who feared the industrial power of Germany and Germany's rising threat to the British naval supperiority.

See what I mean? Very confusing. The pretenses for war were "legitamate" (in their eyes) but the reality is that each country had its own selfish reason for joining in.

Why do I bring all this up? I used to think that people seeking higher office should be intelligent people who were altruistic. But I now think it should be more than that. Perhaps all public officials in higher office should be well educated in either history or ecology. Why history? Even principled leaders are doomed to bring pain and suffering to many if they are not aware of how history shapes the current landscape, much less the lessons of history themselves. (As a sidenote, I find it interesting that the Matrix Trilogy explores the interplay between history, free will, and fate/destiny.)

Why ecology? I think that ecologists are at least aware of the interconnectedness of things. They may not be be experts in economics, but I imagine that they would at least know to look or anticipate how an action may inpact other areas. Same thing with foreign policy. Anyone can learn the "facts on the ground." But it takes the insight to look for and seek the bigger picture of things. And that requires a mindset that has trained you to see the connections of things. I guess history teaches that as well.

Perhaps instead of debates, we should have history questions for the candidates. Would that give the voters anymore insight?